Tuesday, March 1, 2011

German Monks

So, I've told you guys a few stories of our dearly unbeloved platoon sergeant. He's the insane exaggerator/liar. Usually, one his stories will start out believable then all of a sudden, it takes a turn thats puts my colleagues and I into a state of utter bewilderment. Then sometimes, as in the following case, they get even more ridiculous. Well, here is the story of the German Monks. I will just call him and his friend, Fred and Tom, for simplicity's sake.

Fred and Tom hear of an island on the Rhine river that you can take a ferry to and meet some German Monks. (See, this sounds totally believable.) So, on their next weekend they get tickets for the ferry and explore the German Monks' castle. What Fred and Tom didn't know until they found out the hard way was that the ferry they took was the last one of the day and they wouldn't be able to get back to the mainland until morning. (It gets better, much much better.) So they have to spend the night with these German Monks in their castle in the middle of the Rhine river. Well it turns out that these monks, as monks have been known to do, brew their own beer. Fred and Tom get to try the beer and claim that it was the strongest beer known to man. So, Fred and Tom get nice and drunk and listen to the monks tell their stories. And, as it turns out, all of the monks combined know how to speak every languange the world has ever known. That is every language past and present (and probably future).

This is a very good example of how one of his stories starts out honest and sane but then the story hits that certain point where you wonder how this man sleeps at night and how his wife can put up with him.

18 comments:

Motivationalized said...

Hehe, I bet those monks could talk you to death!

Charmander said...

I would love to drink some German beer with a group of monks. That sounds awesome.

Samuel said...

sounds totally believable.......

EpitomeofStrange said...

Ridiculous lies.. Plain as day. But maybe he should write his lies into books and make some $$$

Bruce said...

haha, sounds awesome tbh.

D4 said...

I cried just imagining someone telling me that story with a straight face. The good kind of cry where you laugh and your rubs hurt.

Banacek said...

Wow, I wonder if those monks know all the ancient dead languages as well. That could really help scholars.

Anonymous. said...

Bizarre.

Toto said...

nice story dude!

http://all-around-toto.blogspot.com/

Bassislv said...

what a crazy guy

Candlej- said...

maybe he tells stories, and halfway through, realizes they suck. so then he tries to jazz them up to keep people interested?

randomramblingggg.blogspot.com

meandmythinkingcap said...

German monks seem to be worse than srilankan monks. :)

Brut said...

Haha, I have a couple friends like that.

Lendo Khar said...

Maybe he can only talk with you, because his wife is tired of listen to his stories.

Zakk said...

Just showing my support by stopping by. That's really awesome btw.

The Game Store Guy said...

Sounds unbelievable, but is it quietly bad to hope that those monks really do know most of the languages out there? Just a personal thing of mine. haha

mac-and-me said...

our monks have a long history of beer brewing

tetcrh said...

haha. That's not so unbelievable. Maybe not past languages, barring latin, but all the major current languages, I'd be willing to believe.

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