Thursday, February 3, 2011

Training Meeting

I recently attended a training meeting for driver safety. The following is a list of notes I took from that training meeting. Most of the meeting was spent with people just bullshiting, so I was able to gather quite a bit of fuel for my blog, enjoy.

“My phone ain’t rang in a minute because my bitches don’t love me no more. But I still love all my bitches.”

Person 1: “How many kids you got?”
Person 2: “Two and a possible.”

“I need to go on eBay and find myself some new friends.”

“I won’t hit a female but I will beat a bitch.”

Person 1: “Do the math and add it up.”
Person 2: “I failed Algebra. So, what up now?”

53 comments:

Justin Bieber Fanclub said...

What the hell?! Well in my training there were many women around 40 years, extremelly silent!

murz90 said...

"bitches don’t love me no more. But I still love all my bitches” made my day, oh god :D

Ian Begley said...

Awh man, I had to attened one of these when I was caught speeding.

Jonas said...

lol at the ebay one

RP said...

we all love our biitches....

Waaaoi said...

Damn bitches better go make me a sandwich!

Johnny Drama said...

Haha, "won't hit a female, but i'll beat a bitch," i've heard that before.

Kashmatik said...

Good luck! Many of these meetings are also "surveys" for employees.

fadedline17 said...

“My phone ain’t rang in a minute because my bitches don’t love me no more. But I still love all my bitches.”

I lol'd hard. xD

mulesense said...

I'd never hit a woman. But I'd sure as hell shake a bitch.

StarcraftII said...

Funny quotes bro!!

StarcraftIICommentary.blogspot.com

Xiphas said...

My god and people from the military wonder why people hate them.

Last Remaining Light said...

Gotta love the military :/ lol

Jesse Larkin said...

I failed Algebra. What up now? LOL

cubemike99 said...

You made me lol at all of them. Great stories. Keep going to driver safety training and get more cool stories :D

MRanthrope said...

lol @ Algebra fail!

Ravelizard said...

haha , i lol'd :D

Ravelizard said...

ahahahahaha keep them coming :D some of them are funny

Tasty said...

“I need to go on eBay and find myself some new friends.”

lol'd soo hard.. great post man.

jonwinters said...

i have a couple possibles.

TreeBranchez said...

Algebra wasn't my strong point in maths...

PongoMongo said...

Ha last one is great

Motivationalized said...

Two and a possible, hehe.

HéxXxèN said...

haahaha a love that, i will follow you for more quotes ^^

Auto Tuned Soul said...

This is absolute gold.

Following and supporting!

http://autotunedsoul.blogspot.com

Rabidmoose said...

Lol nice.

Mihai-Edrisch said...

“I won’t hit a female but I will beat a bitch.”

I lol'd hard

Brut said...

I love the I won't hit a female quote hahaha

WorldCraft said...

You can find anything at eBay nowadays. Heck, It's even been added to spell check as a legitimate word, unlike youtube and facebook.

sense said...

lol. always funny stuff

metalpark_73192 said...

haha who the hell looks for friends on ebay?!

Alan said...

I never new the military was this hilarious!

What a wonderful world said...

Thanks for sharing, your posts are hilarious. :)

TreeBranchez said...

Hitting women is something that I generally don't do without a damn good reason (ie, if they provoke it by going up to your face shouting "YOU GONNA HIT ME???"

Matt Bret said...

you have to take good care of your bitches :D

Banacek said...

Wow. Just wow.

Fruffles said...

That's pretty funny, lol.

Mihai-Edrisch said...

Epic, I lold hard at the ''
“I need to go on eBay and find myself some new friends.”''

Right Guard said...

hahah two and a possible?

Come At Me Bro said...

Sweet!

Eindb44s said...

HAHAH few sentence alot of laughs

Screaming Hawk said...

These are awesome. Keep posting man

Lost.in.Idaho said...

Haha, bitches don't like it when you call them bitches...

thenitefalls said...

wow this joke was awesome LOL

What a wonderful world said...

That's very nice, thanks for sharing. :)

Jack said...

Thanks for shareing!

FOllowing!

j1m said...

Haha nice one

Adolph Gingerhorn said...

ok lol

Okko said...

nice quotes

Walkabeast said...

I lawl'd

ilir said...

AHAHAHAHA! Awesome stuff.

Zukin said...

Haha, awesome. I'm joining the navy soon (Damage Control), and I'm really hoping I get great moments like these.

Tifa said...

XD Love these.. I lol'd the hardest for:

“I won’t hit a female but I will beat a bitch.”

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